Letters of Love,

Before August getting mail was nothing exciting because it always meant a bill or some junk, but now that my wonderful husband has been in basic training for 42 days these letters are the only way of communication that we have.  I have talked to him once on the phone for 15 minutes and that was a week ago.  I hate not being able to call him or text him to come over, I hate not being able to see his handsome face walk through my door or going to the mall and seeing him while he's at work, and I hate not having him here when I need someone to talk to or a hug.  I hate it now especially because he hasn't been able to go through these exciting parts of my pregnancy.  I went to my first prenatal appointment alone, I got to hear the heartbeat alone.  The next appointment I have I will get to hear the heartbeat again, and this time I would like to not be alone.  I turn 21 in 11 days and Michael won't be here to go to dinner or a movie with us and I won't be able to get a phone call from him until the 20th or 21st. Then finally after 70 days I will be able to see him on the 24th.  I wrote to him this morning and told him that I wished it was the 24th at 8:59am so in the next minute I could see him marching down the road and then when he was dismissed I could run to him and give him the biggest hug ever.  I had a dream last night that he was here and then I woke up.  I was disappointed.  But why should I be? He hasn't been here in 42 days and I won't get to see him for another 29.  I will drive him to AIT and spend a few days with him there and we will also get a few days at Thanksgiving as well as two weeks at Christmas.  I cannot wait for those!  At Thanksgiving I will be 20 weeks along and we will get to find out BOY or GIRL! I am so excited and I am hoping that Michael will be here if not then around Christmas my Dr. said that we would do a ultrasound so he can see him or her for the first time :) I am more than ready for these next three months to be here!!

I hate the feeling that I am being over dramatic because he is only in basic training,  I have two close friends whose husbands are deployed and I know that we are all hurting in some way.  Everyone has their own way of expressing their pain and I guess in some way blogging about it is mine. 

with more letters and 29 days to go,